Short and from my phone.

Do you ever feel like you are standing at the edge of everything? That no matter what you do you will never be what you want to be? You try and try but nothing ever makes the world seem better? Everything, even the good, is just too bad.

That is how I cirrently feel as I found out about 45 minutes ago that I have a C in my sociology class because of a missing assignment. That's the joy of being able to access grades from online. The only catch is if you dont't know what the assignment is you get to spend a wonderful night feeling like crap because your GPA is on the line and you can't pinpoint why. Yeah. what fun.

I know that it probably isnLt a big deal. It's my first missing assignment and I usually do really well in the class anyway. Besides it's High School sociology. They let you hand homework in late all the time-- I hope. Ugh. I hate this. I hate having bad grades. Yes, in my world anything that is not an A is a bad grade. How can I have over 100% in AP calc 2 but not in a gen. ed. sociology class?

Point being that I now feel like a load od crap because of this. I feel like I have fallen. Between the stress of my senior project (we will get into that on a later date), trying to mantain the last few days of my college holiday, and just attempting to survive I have learned one thing: I CAN'T DO IT! No way. No how.

Okay so maybe I can do it. I am just stumblingevery now and again. So over all something has to change. I can't go on feeling like this much longer. I can't let myself get down because of my disorganization and bad habits.

NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS:

1. I will stay organized with everything. That is school and my senior project.

2. I will keep my room and my study clean.

3. I will blog about something BEFORE I start crying about it.

4. I will keep an eye on my mental health. If it gets out of hand, I WILL GO TO A DOCTOR!

5. I will try to be more positive about life. I have to keep my chin up.

If I think of more I will add them. Now if you read this let me know your resolutuions. (oh and sorry in advanced for all my spelling and grammar mistakes.)